When people feel alone, they are less likely to feel happy and less likely to be productive in any aspect of life. When we know that we are not alone, we tend to be more happy and more productive.
Once, when I was living on my own, a friend asked “Don’t you feel lonely, or alone?” I shared that while I was living alone, I did not feel alone. In fact, I had felt more alone in my marriage than living on my own. I am not alone because I have: book club time, friendship and volunteer time, creative time at work and at home, and meaningful work with a wide variety of clients. All the while, I live in a house that became my home in the first week of residence.
Whether we are introverts or extroverts, we don’t want to be or feel alone. Here are some ways to find yourself “not alone.”
- Meet up with a friend at lunch.
- Find a work-out partner. For example, I see walking-shoed people out at lunch time in pairs.
- Find a trusted listener with whom you can share enough about what you do and have going on that you discover you are not alone.
- Offering and receiving supportive ideas can prevent us from keeping things bottled up and feeling alone.
- Search out one family member with whom you enjoy spending time. Schedule time together.
- Join a hobby-club or a book club. Enjoy a group that enjoys what you find interesting, and you may discover that you are not alone.
Knowing we are not alone allows us to keep our focus at work. Knowing we are not alone allows us to experience hope for today and for the future. When you notice someone else feeling alone, offer to meet up for lunch; pause to listen to a story; or invite the person into a conversation you think might be of interest. We all want to feel seen, heard, and connected to others – to feel Not Alone.